On a night that I am left wondering why horrific things happen to little angels...
On a night that I thought would end a pretty crappy week filled with things that I thought were a pretty big deal but in comparison mean nothing...
On a night that my sweet little three-year old blessing is safely tucked in her bed upstairs I am reminded that this life rarely makes sense. This life is filled with unfairness. This life is crazy. This life is sad.
20-babies were taken away from this earth in a nightmare of a way today around 9AM EST.
I do not understand.
I do not understand much these days.
But I do understand this; I understand this without a shadow of a doubt and for this I am grateful.
May Gods protection, peace and comfort fall upon those that lost babies and loved ones in the massacre in CT today. I pray for your broken heart and I pray for its healing today...and for the many many days to follow...
I have shared a few of these videos on Facebook over the last few weeks. Today, I thought I would dive a bit deeper.
As I sit and ponder Thanksgiving and all of the many people and things that I am super grateful for I also can not imagine what is going through the minds of the people that lost their earthly possessions. While I know as Christians we are to not store up riches on earth as ours await in heaven, however we are human. We like our stuff. Our homes make us feel safe, our homes are where we have wonderful memories that have been created throughout our lives. We have favorite things, favorite shoes, the best winter coat, the family photos, the quilt that our grandmother made that you were saving for your daughter...
While I know for a fact that the people I know that lost everything are grateful for their lives & their families there may come a point where they are just pissed that they lost their homes & their stuff.
I pray for them during this time.
I remind myself every single morning when I get out of my bed in the morning that there are people down the street that lost everything. You too need to remember these people. Remember the storm.
I know that there are many people that just want things to go back to normal around here but I pray that we do not forget those so very close to us that are still trying to get a grip, build a new life and may be going through a new stage of grief here very soon.
A few YouTube videos:
Union Beach: This is where Ryan's grandmother raised 7-children & lived for over 60-years. This is where many people that we know lost everything.
This is one of many of the lines for gas after the storm. This particular line went for miles and led to the Wawa gas station at the highway near our house. While we wanted to film this we didn't so I am glad someone caught it on film. And you wonder why we had to go to odd-even fueling days around here?!
Here is Sea Bright. Our beaches, our restaurants, our fond fond memories...
I have a bit of battery on the ol laptop right now so I wanted to vent a little bit...forgive me.
First of all, we are safe, and we have a home. We are without power and surrounded by sadness that I can not express.
I am struggling with not only lack of patience, a broken heart, freezing to the bone, and a sick child...but I am struggling with sadness over loss of places...loss of places where family gathered, where family felt safe and happy, places where I had my first date with my husband, places where I took my baby to swim in the ocean for the first time, places I used to go to for peace.
I didn't know these feelings of sadness existed.
Sure, I had seen people loosing their lives on the news before.
Sure, I am grateful that I am alive and my whole family is safe.
I assure you it is not the loss of the "stuff" that is making me so stinken sad, its the loss of places that hold very special memories to me that is making me so so stinken sad. Its the fact that people that I love so very much have lost everything and do not have a home anymore...
As I am literally screaming at my 3-year old during a ride home from a grocery store breakdown when this song came on the radio.
This song was a direct message from God to not harm my child. It was. No doubt about it.
You can think I am a bad mom. That is okay because in that time I was a bad mom. I was so mad, I was so tired, I was so over the whole mess that we now live in that I was screaming at my baby.
I am thankful for a God that still reals me in. I will choose to praise Him in this storm.
Thank you for listening to the vent...now if you too are going through stuff please choose to praise Him in the storm. He knows just what you need and will carry you. I just need to be carried today, hugging my heavenly father as he carries me...Do you?
I have my dear friend Shayla to thank for this amazing recipe.
I have altered the original recipe just a little. With today's FULL game schedule & a hurricane on the way I am thinking I will be cooking a lot today while we still have power. :) This will be on the menu.
Crispy Chicken Bites
What you will need:
1 lb. chicken breast cutlets
2 Tbs. Dijon mustard, Honey mustard of Saracha hot sauce (this all depends on your taste, I am going to do Dijon and Saracha today:)
11/2 c. Panko bread crumbs (I used whole wheat Panko)
Preheat oven to 450.
Pour Panko crumbs onto large plate for dipping.
In mixing bowl combine mustard or hot sauce with a teaspoon of pepper.
Once chicken is cut into thick strips coat chicken with mixture. (enough that bread crumbs will adhere)
Press coated chicken into breadcrumbs. Coat both sides and place in lightly greased baking dish.
Bake for 10-15 minutes or until juices run clear.
or greek yogurt (again depending on the flavor that you are going for)
I used the balsamic glaze for the Dijon version the other night and it was amazing!
For the balsamic glaze place 1 tsp pepper & 1/2c. balsamic vinegar in sauce pan and bring to a boil. Reduce until syrupy.
Place in small dipping bowl & enjoy!
(I will be using greek yogurt and a little lime juice for todays spicy bites.)
** Lilly loved the Dijon version. Also, for those of you that do not like Dijon all that much rest assured it does not have a strong flavor in this recipe. Ryan is not a huge fan but did not even know it was one of the main ingredients. They cleared their plates. ;)
This verse is my screen saver.
I am under serious construction.
You know they say that it is who you are when no one is looking that matters.
I do not like the woman that stares me back in the mirror, the woman that follows me around all day, the mother to my daughter, the wife to my husband.
We are not getting along right now. (me, myself and I that is.)
Thankfully, I have a God that is not done with me yet.
I am permanently under construction. This I know but there gets to be times in life when you look around and you seem to be surrounded by pot holes that need filling, pealing paint, leaky roofs & you get sick of it.
I am tired all the time, I am bummed out most days, I beat myself up for the little things, I yell at my girl for things that are not necessary.
It is scary to be in a season of change. I know what God is calling me to do and for some reason I am too scared to take the leap. I am too scared to be who He has created me to be. I am too scared that people will not like me. I am too scared that people will look at me like I am crazy.
Why do I care??
This is why I recently finally picked us the Welsh book When people are big and God is small.
I am sick of letting people get too big throughout my day, throughout my thoughts.
I am thankful He follows me around.
I am thankful he has my back & I am thankful that I am a work in progress.
Now, if only I could get out of His way and let Him do His work in me.
This is the only way I can achieve true peace.
I am my happiest, my calmest, my most content when I let God be God, do His thing in my life and be on the throne. Who or what is on your throne today? I am telling you, I am promising you...If you surrender your life to your creator you will be complete. Dig in the word, talk to someone, talk to me! Love you all. Have a good day! oxox