Good-bye's

Sniffle-sniffle.

I have survived...the move. Leaving the place that I have lived for over 10-years unscathed. I think...

Here are a few shots from our last week.

I know; I look tired. Really tired. I was. I am.

Our official birthday, 4th of July & good-bye BBQ.

Lisa, Tia Shayla, Danielle & I...I miss these faces already!!

My last fix of Melee Thai for a long while. This has been my favorite food since the day I moved my toosh to NJ.

Usual suspects: Shayla, Tina (Tin, did we get a shot together that night on your phone? I do not have one!) and Lynda. Little Miss Sophia was not even a sparkle in Lynda's eyes when we first met. Where did the time go?

We miss your face so much already Ms Shayla! ox

On our way out of town we stopped by Ryan's moms house for a few days in PA.
We were able to get some cousin time in.
Lilly & Isaac checking out the giant aquarium at Cabelas. hehe...

Honestly, I have never been to a Calelas before. This one in PA has lots of hicks there to buy guns and such. I had more fun people watching. Lilly on the other hand begs to go every time she is at Noni & Pop-pops to see all of the fishes and stuffed animals. (yup, that's a real stuffed bear. no big deal)
Loves it!

There it is. We took the plunge. We sold the house, packed it up and have officially relocated to Raleigh, NC.
I have met all the neighbors, made friends with our garbage man, had our local Allstate agent tell me to call her whenever I get lonely and need to chat, had random people approach me in the parking lot asking to return my cart for me since I had a little girl with me and had my hands full. Even my experience with the DMV was a pleasure!?? I mean really!! Crazyyy...The list goes on.
It is a breath of fresh air to be surrounded by genuinely nice people.
Stay tuned for more pictures!!

Times are a changen.

This quote just makes me happy!

Image Source

So I realize that I have been completely radio silent for like months. I apologize!

We listed our house on the market a little over three-months ago. It sold a month ago.

During the last 5 weeks we wandered the country searching for the next best place to settle our family.

We have been to the Bay area to Raleigh and back to NJ in search of where God wants us. We  have looked at tiny homes, big homes, apartments, condos, beautiful historic homes, and creapy homes. We have looked at cheap homes and million dollar homes, we have looked in the west, we have looked in the south and we have looked in the north east. I have yelled at God for not allowing me to live back home in the Bay Area for now. I have worried that we would not find somewhere to live before our house closes next Friday and our home is emptied out by complete strangers packing up my belongings and shoving them on a truck.

There are a million tiny moving parts in our life right now and I know without a doubt that two weeks from now I will look back exhausted knowing I am right where He wants me. Isn't that awesome!

As of a half our ago we are holding a lease agreement for the very first home Ryan and I looked at in Raleigh and the very first home after weeks of looking that we both agreed could be the next place to settle on our journey. The house is also for sale so we have decided to rent first and place an offer if we are led to do so later. 

Its been rocky. Its been an adventure. I am ready for the next chapter south of the Mason Dixon line.

For those of you who know me you will not be surprised by my new to-do list:

* learn to line dance

* buy Lilly and I at least one more pair of cowgirl boots

* learn to slow down

* create MORE! (I will have my own studio space in this house and it makes me so happy that I could pee my pants)

There is my excuse for the lack of my blogging rambling. I am going to try my darndest to document our live changes over the next few weeks. STAYTUNED!!

It be Friday!

Love love love spring. Sitting outside with coffee and my computer without the rude mosquito intruders! Savoring every moment this week!

What have you all been up to?

Highlights for this week:

planted super pretty flowers

organized my living space

had brunch with family

continue to read Gone Girl

caught up on Revenge (oooiii)

was a warrior mama and survived Lilly's shenanigans of toddlerhood.

Monday night as I was cooking dinner I turned to see that a princess would be joining us for dinner.
Glad I grabbed a snap shot of this little doll.
FYI This was the last of her angelic moments for the week. She was a duzzy of a three year old the remainder of the week!

Finally, the game changer.
 Banana almond oat pancakes.
I have a little pancake lover in the house. She begs me to make pancakes at least three times every week.
Today we made these:
AMAZING!
PS Yes, I did add choco chips. It is Friday after all. ;)

HAPPY FRIDAY face!!
May you all have a fab weekend and we will chat again next week!

Mothers Day!??

I do not know about the rest of you but to be honest...

after my week...

the LAST thing I want to do is spend another day with my daughter.

 I know its MOTHERS Day after all and I know I am an awful mom for admitting this. Am I the only one? *eekk*

Do not get me wrong; I love my daughter more than life itself but its been a hell of a week.

Mothers Day 13 by jilliebeans featuring a photo bracelet

Alex and Ani photo bracelet
bloomingdales.com

Alex and ani bangle
bloomingdales.com

Pink Tulips in a Vase
canadaflowers.ca

Watercolor Heart Art Print 8x10 from Original Watercolor Painting...
etsy.com

Quiet Please wood sign
etsy.com

Is it Friday yet?

The eye twitch and a thrown out back...thinking my body is trying to send a memo to my brain to chill out a bit.

With the house in a constant state of "ready to show", the May drizzles, a return from an entirely too short visit to Jamaica and a three-year-old who thinks she can talk to me like a degenerate I am dragging a bit.

In other news when that sun does break through the clouds lately it is just beautiful out! Everything is in full bloom, the birds are chirping and it smells of spring. Happiness.

Depiction of life in these parts to follow. ;)

Spring time (before the bugs hatch) is our favorite time to eat outside! 

YAY!

Do not let that face fool you; she is full of the "three's" lately. Most of the time I am speechless and I feel like I spend more time yelling at here and sending her to her room than I care to admit. But I sorta did just admit it; oh well. Mommy of the year award will not be headed this way.

Hence; the fourth Child Wise book being my latest nighttime read. *sigh*

Just when you are thinking: "What have I raised here?!" in defeat my little love makes me this  adorable planter for mothers day. *Perfect*

Its my favorite thing. Ever.

When the rain pours down I take my mind here...

Our view from our balcony this last weekend.

*What peace this brings my soul.*

When I am at peace I want to paint and I have not sat down and done that in what seems like forever!

Time to get my hands painty! Is that a word? Nope; but I like it.

There is the latest. What are some of your struggles or happy things lately?

Wishing you all a happy Thursday! ox

PS I promise I am working on a new blog schedule to get me back into the groove. Hang in there please!

The Mondays

I have to admit with the images issues that I am having with Pinterest my blogging inspiration is lacking...greatly! I apologize!

The house has been on the market for a few weeks now and we have had three couples who seemed really interested and were ready to put in offers and. then. nothing...yet?!

We will see. Knowing that this whole next chapter is in Gods hands and that he already has all of the details worked out I am at rest. I know that there is no where I would rather be than where He wants me. I have fought is will before and it doesn't end well. There is stress there and there is much struggle and I end up just not happy.

"For I know the plans I have for you Jillian. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you plans to give you hope and a future." Jer 29:11 In other words girl, chill out. I am chilled out.

In other news we had a lovely weekend. The weather was perfection. We had a BBQ. I did lots of shopping for our little trip this weekend. 

Oh! I also found my new favorite Pandora radio station! Type in "Toad the Wet Sprocket" and you will have a play list of 90's alternative perfection. LOVE IT!

Shayla and I also found a fun little San Diego style Mexican food joint: Pops Garage. Delish!

With rain due in for the next two days we will be laying low. Ryan is away again so I will be catching up on some more Downton Abbey *happiness!!* I have my first spray tan on Thursday. I have been in NJ for nine years and well, its time I at least faked it a little. ;) I will let you all know how it goes. haha!

What did you all do this weekend? Any special week plans?

I just loved this quote. I am so sappy & emotional so this totally spoke to me.
Happy Monday everyone! ox

Image source here.

Breakthroughs...

Image Source Here.


Thanks to a dear friend I have just started reading THIS book. It is, as warned; amazing, heart wrenching, thought provoking and completely encouraging.

I was called while reading to just write. To forgo the worry of complete sentences, perfectly built paragraphs; to be real, to share my thoughts.

Growing up for the most part "in the church" I felt the need to look, act and think a certain way. For me this was to avoid conflict, judgement and because at times it was easier in that specific circle.
It was not until I was saved that this all changed however some habits die hard.

The overwhelming need was not necessarily fit in but to have company, to not be alone. I still struggle with this. Very much so. What an emotional journey.

My journey is one that I am thankful is not over yet. My God shaped hole is part of who I am. We all have holes but what we do with those holes makes you who you are in that time, in that place. I have been a few different women since my entrance into the world on a hot August morning in 1979. I would like to at some point soon look in the mirror and know without a doubt that I am who I am, where I am suppose to be and using my God given talents just the way He wants me to and completely fulfilled, happy, me. Is that possible? I sure as hell hope so.

I desire to shed the "must be and say what everyone wants me to" and bloom into the "who cares I am me and I love her" soon. Very soon. 

This book has challenged me in the first 2 chapters more than I could have ever imagined and now I write. I write so that I do not forget. I write to inspire myself, to inspire you...

Think of the true, amazing and deep relationships in your life... did you get those amazing relationships by hiding you? Did you get them with shallow conversation? Did you get them by hiding what is really on your heart and on your mind? Did you get them by acting a way that you thought would get you accepted?

As I sit here with a new "For Sale" sign on my homes front lawn and no neighbors to have said "we will be sad to see you go" I ponder the relationships that I have made here over the last few years. Was I real here, did I open up here? Do I have an overwhelming desire to run away to another state another town because people do not like me for me or did I not give them me?

Do I do it for protection?
Do I do it to avoid judgement?
Do I do it because at times its just easier to adapt to your environment and those around you?

All I know is that I have one heck of an amazing creator. I know he knows what he was doing when he created me and that he has awesome plans for my life if I would just let Him take the reigns more than once in a while.

Back to Polyvore.

I do not know how I forgot about my love of messing around on Polyvore; but boy has this morning been fun!

Here are a few of my spring obsessions.

More to come!

Happy Wednesday everyone!

ox

Spring 2013 by jilliebeans featuring t-strap shoes

Old Navy graphic design t shirt
oldnavy.gap.com

American Eagle Outfitters american eagle outfitter
ae.com

American Eagle Outfitters t-strap shoes
ae.com

Michael michael kors tote
$540 - farfetch.com

Pacifica
target.com

Zigzag Wool Rug Espresso
westelm.com

Deco Floral Pillow
trinaturk.com

Trina Turk La Jolla Pink Pillow
zincdoor.com

Inspiration.

I do hope that this post finds you having enjoyed an awesome Easter weekend.

I can not believe it is over but we did have a really nice weekend.

My flowers are starting to bloom and the average temperature has been in the 60's for the last few days so I am encouraged.

We laid low, had our Tia Shayla stay the weekend. Lilly's little friend Jack had his 4th Birthday party on Saturday and honestly I spent the entire day cooking and playing stealth Easter Bunny yesterday.

Easter is one of my favorite holidays for the following reasons:

It is a celebration of Jesus's resurrection! How amazing is that!! 

Signs of spring are showing in the budding trees and flowers.

I am reminded that after a long winter, dreary days and colorless landscape that God makes all things new. It is a time of renewal and encouragement. 

What did you all do over the weekend?

My beautiful little girl trying ever so hard to pause from her exciting hunt to pose for her mommy.

oxox

In other news:

What we are eating - 

We are still on the wagon with our clean eating routine and feeling kinda better than ever.

(My "go to meal" Tempeh, veggies and peanut sauce...)

What I am reading - 

Barefoot Season (prequel to Three Sisters) by Susan Mallery

What I am looking forward to - 

Planting some flowers with my girl.

Trying some new recipes from this book!

Getting on a jet plane to the west coast to see my family and a little weekend-er to Jamaica in May to see some friends get hitched.

Warm spring nights on the deck in front of a fire...ahhhh

Our house selling to an amazing family...from this keyboard to Gods ears...

What about you all? What are you looking forward to in this new season? 

Awwee...

I had such a lovely time this last weekend with two dear friends.

We ate amazing southern food, we drank good wine, but most importantly we talked and we laughed harder than I know I have in a really, really long time.

This weekend could not have come at a better time. I was about to crack under the sadness of a long winter and total loneliness that comes with it.

I needed to connect with my people.

I have & I feel whole again.

Source: retro-pictures.tumblr.com viaKat on Pinterest

Catch up.

I realize I have been so bad with posts this week. 

I guess I have a little catch up to do, don't I?!

Here are a few things that have been going on in this crazy mind this week:

I am loving the thought that in less than 24-hours I will be Atlanta with some good girl company.
It is the first girls weekend we have been able to get together in 2-years!
I can. not. wait!!
I will be out of blogging commission until next Monday/ Tuesday.
Love, love, love...

Source: google.com viaDettre @ on Pinterest

I can not begin to tell you how good yoga has been for me. I am a worrier. I am a stress-er. I am completely unbalanced most of the time thanks to these things.
My daily yoga physically kicks my butt into gear and mentally my priorities where they should be.
I have been doing weekly acupuncture for a few months now and my acupuncturist can tell by looking at my tongue how worried/ stressed I am. This is when she asks me "What are you hoping to control or change by worrying?".
The ultimate silent killer people.
In the mean time I will work on catching myself when I worry, and balance my day with a yoga time out.

Source: fitsugar.com viaLani on Pinterest

True story. I am on the coaster trying to love the ride. :)
Happy Thursday everyone! Till next week ta-ta!
ox

Source: djmelodie.tumblr.com viaMichael on Pinterest

Its just worse on Monday...

The bird chirping outside my bedroom window as I try to get a few more moments of peaceful rest is just annoying...because its Monday.

The sounds of the garbage truck is just more annoying...because its Monday.

The gloomy weather outside is just beyond annoying...because its Monday.

I was reading Edies post over at Life in Grace a few moments ago and it spoke to me in ways that she may not have even intended.

It is my mood lately that has left me feeling like such a failure. I am thankful that spring is on its way. I am thankful that we are promised flower blossoms, renewal that comes with Easter and His reminder that He loved us so dang much that He sent His son Jesus to die for us.
Life is just better when my eyes are fixed on Jesus. There is nothing else that will take away the Mondays.

Maybe its the weather. Maybe its the isolation. Maybe its the uncertainty of what is going to happen with our house and our future. Maybe it just my chronic guilt.

It is all worse on Monday.
But for this I am grateful...

II Corinthians 12:9-10

Source: godsgreeneyedgirl.tumblr.com via Augusta on Pinterest

Time for some Kava tea and a quiet time.

Love you all and hope you have a lovely day.

ox

Garlic-y Thyme Tempeh

I stumbled across Punk Post Kitchen on my journey to find yummy vegetarian recipes. Great food blog!

I tried tempeh for the first time at Good Karma Cafe in Red Bank. I have tried many a great vegan/ vegetarian stuff at this awesome establishment. :) 

For those of you wondering what the heck tempeh is here is a link explaining a bit about it. Tempeh goes over better in this house because it is much firmer than tofu. You feel like you are eating serious substance as opposed to the sometimes soggy texture of tofu. 

I get the organic 3-seed tempeh at Trader Joes. Super yummy but be sure to follow the cooking directions on this recipe so that it has maximum flavor.

Give it a try?!

This is on the menu tonight and I am amped on it!

Source: theppk.com via Jillian on Pinterest

In other weekly news:

I am officially hooked on Downtown Abby. (thanks to all that helped me become an addict...you know who you are) Hoping to start season 2 after Yoga today...shhhh...

I just downloaded the new Jeremy Camp CD; Reckless. Super awesome!

I am reading a new book: Three Sisters, Susan Mallory

How was your week?

I create.

Blogger has been giving me hell this week whenever I try to upload my own pictures...*sigh*

I finally was able to get this one up!

There has been a blank wall in Lilly's room for a while. I have not known what to do with it so we headed to Marshall's bought her a big girl clock and I whipped up a painting for her.

I love how it turned out. :)

Happy Wednesday everyone!

ox

Yummo!

Yet another gloomy day out and I am thinking some cookie baking may be in order!

No better way to lift the mood in the house. Am I right?!

I found this amazing recipe over at LaFuji Mama

Blueberry Yogurt Cookies (no oil or butter in this beauty;)

 P.S. Anna, this is the one I was talking about!

Source: lafujimama.com via Kirsten on Pinterest

Action needed...

You know that feeling when you read something that really pulls on your heart strings and you say to yourself "I really want to get involved! I need to get involved!".??

Then you continue to see this issue; this need pop up again and again?

I just know it is a God thing.

We are praying here how to proceed.

Melody over at Brave Girls Club headed to Manila a few weeks ago with Full Circle Exchange & Wipe Every Tear.
Her stories (Part 1 & Part 2) are amazing, heart retching & life changing. (They were for me...)
Please take a few minutes to read her stories, watch the video and pray for girls/women all over the world who live in slavery every single day...

Source: natashametzler.com via Kalynn on Pinterest

Here is how you can help!!
Dahlia House Fundraising Site

There are so many opportunities to help those in need all over the world. You can pray for them, you can purchase these amazing women's products and/or you can help fund houses such as Dahlia House where these women can go to get out of their life of slavery and start over.

How amazing is it to know that you can make a difference right now...

Inspired Friday!

With the snow falling at a steady clip this morning I am dreaming of shorts, sunshine and yummy food.

Typically, darker painted rooms are not my favorite but this one is made warm and cozy with the bright light, pops of flowers, and beautiful timeless pieces.
Is that a stove below the mirror? Amazing!

Source: flickr.com via Troy on Pinterest

Pretty much loving each of these pieces minus the bikini clad miss in the corner (who knows) and the vest. Lets be honest; I wouldn't wear the vest. ;)

Source: polyvore.com via Vero on Pinterest

My kindle, some iced tea and this room. Yes, please!

Source: bohocircus.typepad.com via Arelyn on Pinterest

Everything about this veggie curry spread looks amazing!
I may be adding this to the meal mix for next week. Stay tuned folks!

Source: jamieoliver.com via Estelle on Pinterest

Nothing too excited planned for the weekend. Staying warm and dreaming of flower pots and BBQ's...ya know; my usual. ;)
You?

A few of my favorite things:

We have had a busy day around here.

Yet another day of flood warnings, evacuations and wind gusts up to 60 mph. Lets just say the good ol NJ is getting to be just too much for me to handle.

That said; Lilly and I are hunkered down, eating peanut butter popcorn (THANK YOU Lisa at With Style and Grace!!!) and watching cartoons.

Source: withstyleandgraceblog.com via Jillian on Pinterest

In other news:

In addition to my daily yoga work out I was able to get the arms a little more muscle action scrubbing my daughters autograph off of her bedroom wall. Red crayon nonetheless. Good times!

Now, I have had to clean scuffs off of my walls before. I have searched Google high and low for the perfect fix...& today an answer to prayers was found.

I purchased a few products from a good friend who sells Shaklee the other day.

One of the products is the H2 Organic Super Cleaning Concentrate. This stuff is only a little over 12 bucks and provides 48 gallons of organic, toxin free cleaning for your home. I am in love.

Honestly, everything else I have used on my walls has left spots. You can see where I have scrubbed. This did not! Crayon artwork gone. Happy Dance!

H2 Degreaser  + micro fiber towl + elbow grease = clean walls.

For those of you looking to streamline your cleaning products this may be the perfect solution!
I am obsessed with cleaning products and their smells.
I have been a Method product hoarder for quite some time & the thought of having only three bottles of cleaning products that can clean everything in my home is a dream.
I added some lavender essential oil to my all purpose spray yesterday to appease my senses. :)
Now, head over to Robins site if you are so inclined. You will not regret the purchase!

Source: pinterestschunt919.blogspot.com via Sonya on Pinterest

What are some of your favorite things lately?